Don't be fooled by a feline

Dear-Addled-on-Cortes
There's been mention of pups and dog care in general lately, but nothing about 
cats. Do you think this is fair?
Covered-in-Cat-Hair

Dear Cat Hair
You are absolutely correct in feeling slighted. I've been neglecting the subject of
cats and there are so many uses for a cat! One can serve them stewed, boiled, sauteed
with ginger and basil: stir-fried, deep-fried (after you batter them, that's always fun),
stuffed with onions and baby mice, baked in tomato sauce, wrapped in filo pastry, and,
my personal favourite -- kitty pot pied! to mention but a few. Once skinned, cat pelts 
can be effective as rugs, wall tapestries, toupees or footwarmers. A cured skin makes
a drum with an excellent voice ( too high pitched for my taste) and is easy and fun to
bead. Should you have a flair for taxidermy the cat can be arranged in a variety of
poses making it useful as a coat hanger, a hat rack, multiple toilet tissue dispenser, 
scarecrow for the pantry or as a handy object to hang your fishing gear on. Being of a
somewhat reactive nature cats make perfect lab assistants- experiments and all that. A
lobotomized cat is a good cat for a' that. You see, they even inspire poetry! Prose and
poetry, cats and art, cats and history, cat and fantasy, horror, suspense. Such a wide
range of uses. If you have questions on other animals, or recipes for, please, do let me
know.
Signed Addled-on-Cortes